You Dig?

My mouth is on fire! Okay, actually, it's more like it's being crushed between two sumo wrestlers, but either way... IT HURTS! Man oh man.

Soooo... my growing sense of worry has been assuaged by a simple text. My internal conflict has very nearly been resolved and my sense of doubt has been calmed. However, I am more wary than ever.... I don't want to let my guard down and I don't want to broadcast my full trust just yet. As they say, trust once lost is never regained. For me, it is regained, just EXTREMELY slowly. I am quick to trust a first time and slow to trust a second time. In fact, so slow, it's seems like it's hardly trust at all. I don't think that's just me though... I think I'm just slower to re-trust than most. For example, it's been two and a half years, but my parents still don't trust me. They certainly trust me more than they did 2 1/2 years ago, but nowhere near as much as they did 3 years ago. And the worst part is, I've done more to earn their trust in the last 2 1/2 years than all the years before that combined. But whatever, I made my mistakes and I need to pay for them. Anyway, my point is, I'm not so quick to regift trust. That's why trust is more important to me than love. I would honestly rather be despised and trusted than loved and distrusted.

I just wrote a mucho cool letter to Greg. The envelope is tres bon.