Life and confusion

So, this weekend. I know that not really a sentence, but just imagine me saying it and it will make better sense. As I was saying, this weekend.

Friday was utterly uneventful except for about forty five minutes spent with my best friend in my car. She knows what I'm talking about. Very day-brightening, indeed. After that, my family went to the lake where we spent the night and some of the next day. It was mucho fun, but I am very sore and slightly burned. It's mostly tan by today.

Saturday afternoon/evening, we had the parade, which was pretty much terrible like I expected. I was at least excited to hang with my friends, but they were mostly doing other things *cough* texting, so I was kinda bored, but that's ok, it was for a worthy cause. :) I think Logan is mad at me for something, although I'm not quite sure what. It always bothers me when you know someone's mad at you, but they won't say a thing about it, but they just act all... well, ya know. Anyway, doesn't really change anything.

Today I totally forgot about byc and my bishop let me know it too. He would not let it go. Hmm.

Oh, so I've been having this weird dream/thing. I don't know how to describe it so anyone reading it could understand... it's not quite a daydream, not quite a hallucination. More like an alternate existence that I get to visit sometimes. I know that sounds crazy, but it is me we're talking about. So as I was saying.... weird dream thing. The first one was about me sleeping in Mr. Mast's class (next year). The bell rings and everyone leaves. Mr. M comes over to wake me up and I ask him if he would let me stay in his class for a few minutes since he doesn't have another class anyway. He gets to asking me if there's something the matter and I tell him a bit about what's on my mind. I ask him if he's ever known he's had to do something, but been terrified to do it. He says yes. I ask him what he does to help him get through it. He says he just does it and doesn't think about it. Then he asks what I have to do, so I tell him about my "gift/curse." I tell him I have to save someone, but it might go badly for me. He asks me who I have to save, and I just look at him. I look at the clock and see that it's almost time. He asks again and I say, "you." I kick his knees out from under him just before the two shooters I saw come into the room. They don't see him, so they ask me where he is. They don't have their guns out yet so I tell them he's in the bathroom and will be out in a minute. Mast tries to get up, but I kick him again.... the shooters don't notice. I walk towards them and they start to freak out a little. One of them reaches back like he's getting his gun, but thinks better of it. When I'm about three feet from them, Mr. Mast gets up and they pull the guns. He ducks down and I kick out the first one's knees. Mast grabs the gun. I get the second one's arm in that backwards position so I can break it if i need to. Then everything goes blank.

The second one is the one I've been having for a couple months, but it's changed a little. I go to Alex's house, knowing that it's the last time I'll see her. I knock on the door and sister Lupton answers. I ask if Alex is home and she says no. I pull out the envelope with the letter, the journal, and the locket. I ask sister lupton to make sure that alex gets the package. I thank her for everything and resist giving her a hug. I know I can't be conspicuous. I turn and walk away, get in my car, and drive off to the car accident that I know awaits me. It's immensely hard, but I know that Alex will be alright as long as she figures out the locket.

These probably don't make sense, but I doubt that anyone will read about them anyway. They make sense to me. I left some things out of the second one, because if Alex does end up reading it, I don't want the future to be compromised by any suspicions.

Oh so to add to the weekend, I had another, "midnight chat" with you know who you know where. It was very nice. Perhaps we will make it a weekly thing. I really like just talking to this person. Unfortunately, i don't think I would like anything more with this person.

Thus it is and forever shall be.